I went on the worst date imaginable with a person who was comically racist. I want to talk about it.
Ok, let’s get the background to this story out of the way as quickly as we can.
I didn’t have much of a desire to use Tinder. I don’t date for the most part, and all my friends think this is a waste. So they coaxed me into it using it, partially on the notion that quarantine is the best time to do this. I have no idea where this idea came from, but I went along with it.
I swiped right on autopilot pretty much till my fingers were sore. After a few months of doing this, I matched with someone.
I can ignore the fact that this person used some judicious pictures of themselves on their app. Most of them were several years old. I can’t say I was too happy about it, but it was fine.
The first thing we did was sit down at a cafe and chat for a little bit. I figured this would be a good plan, particularly as I was already thinking about how to beat a retreat (if someone is willing to be dishonest with pictures, how else will they be dishonest) if things continued to go south.
And south they went.
Conventional wisdom says there are things you should avoid talking about on first dates. Your job is one of them (I take this to mean not to go too indepth) and your politics are another. My job came up pretty quickly, and in the doing her politics came up pretty fast. I didn’t like what I found.
It was a lot of the same old misinformation and poor apologetics for the pretty horrific opinions that people have regarding their opinions about the refugee crises here in Greece. And a whole lot of it began with “I am not a racist but…”
The conversation was obviously trying for me. Not only did I not particularly appreciate the subject matter, but she was talking about things that I knew well more about than she did. This might be your country, but it is my fucking job, and I have access to some information that maybe you don’t. So I have put here some of the greatest hits from that night, and my rebuttals to her dumb fucking points.
I’m not a racist but:
a lot of these people come from countries were there isn’t even a war going on right now. Like Afghanistan.
Holy shit. Afghanistan? Are you fucking kidding me? Just because the US congress or the UN or whomeverthefuck doesn’t officially call what is going on in a certain country a war doesn’t mean that things are yay-awesome there. Things have been pretty shit there for the past twenty years, and US actions have destabilized a country. War is a political label detached to the relity of what is going on. If it doesn’t get officiated, it doesn’t get the label.
And that is some bullshit.
But that aside, what the fuck difference does that make? Whether or not there is a war is independent as to whether things make for a good life in a certain country. If a person is from Saudia Arabia, where there is currently not a lot of risk of being hurt in a conflict, but that person is either gay or an atheist, should they be obliged to stay there?
This point is dumb.
I’m not a racist but:
these people get access to better resources and medical care than your everyday Greek.
I don’t fucking believe you. Again, I go to these refugee camps. I go pretty fucking regularly. It’s my fucking job. And while I am there, I get a pretty good look at what is going on. Among the things I see are the medical actors, who are pretty consistently overworked. There is often a line of people waiting to see them.
I have seen people laying in agony outside the doctors in the refugee camp. Don’t think I have seen that at all walking around with the everyday Greeks.
Resources? I have been inside people’s houses inside the refugee camp. You know, those houses made of insulated sheet metal. Yea… I wouldn’t call that great resources.
I’m not a racist but:
these people need to go home. We have our own problems here and we cannot help them. They need to go back to where they came from.
Greece takes money from the EU to take a and house these refugees. It also grossly misappropriates the money. You don’t want them? Fine. Some other country will take them. But you have to give the money back.
They should go back home, should they? Do you really think these people left their homes on a fucking whim, just becasue they were bored? Do you think they could just go back? Would you do those things? If the refugees are here, dealing with the things that they are dealing with, they are doing so because they HAD to leave their home. If they go back, there will be consequences.
But if people need to go back to their homes, I know a whole lot of Greeks hiding out in the rest of europe… and America… and Australia. You ready to take them back?
And if all that shit wasn’t enough, she tried to stick her tongue down my throat. First fucking date.