In my previous posts I talked about my disappointing class as well as the awkward, somewhat crazy opinion of my father. If only that were the extent of it. Composed here is a greatest hits of stupid, disappointing conversations I had over a two month  period.

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Venezuelan Student: I don’t understand how (incident) can happen in this country! Is there no social safety net?

(Later, another student suggests the US adopts some kind of social safety net)

Venezuelan Student: No! That’s socialism!

***

Student A (Jordanian male, 24, nice but very naive): I like Israel.

Other Arab students: (Glare with hatred)

Me: Tell me why, Student A.

Student A: I lived in Palestine. Israeli would build things, but the Arabs would only tear them down. Arabs are only good at destroying. They are not making Palestine a better place.

Other Arab Students: You do realize that you are an Arab, right?

***

Me: [Trying to get the students to understand the potential benefits of the American healthcare system] Which country has the highest number of Nobel Prizes in Medicine?

Student A [Azerbaijani, male, late 20’s, if Chlamydia were an animated Disney character, it would look like this guy]: Israel.

Me: No

Student A: Israel.

Me: No. Would anyone else like to guess?

Student A: Israel.

Me: I heard  you the first time.

Rest of class: [Silence]

Me: It’s America. Who’s number 2?

Student A: Isra-

Me: It’s not Israel.

Rest of class: [Silence]

Me: It’s the UK. So how many Nobel Prizes of medicine does the US have?

Student A: Israel.

Me: Are you even paying attention?

Other students: 5! 10!

Me: The US has 93 Nobel prizes in medicine. How many does the UK have?

Rest of class: [Silence]

Me: About 30. What country is third?

Student A: Israel.

Me: It’s not… it’s Germany, ok? And they have sixteen Nobel prizes.

This is continued for the remaining twelve entries. Israel is nominated after every one. Israel is never on the list.

Me: So why do you guys think that the US has so many more Nobel prizes than other countries?

Student A: Because those scientists are Jews.

***

Last day of class.

Student A: [Finishes a presentation on abortion] Any questions?

Student B (Jordanian male, 24, nice but very naive): Why would anyone have an abortion? In my country there are no abortions.

Me: You gotta be fucking kidding me…